Mentor and Mentee: Four Simple Analogies of a Mentoring Relationship
Posted: Tuesday, June 21, 2011
by Mogama
http://www.mogama.info
The dictionary defines the noun "mentor" as "a wise and trusted counselor or teacher." The verb "mentor" means "to serve as a trusted counselor or teacher to (another person)."
Due to the popularity of mentoring a relatively new word, "mentee", has entered the English lexicon. (My word processor does not even know yet that "mentee" is really a word.) As you may guess, a "mentee" is the person who is mentored.
Mentoring is neither a radical concept or a modern practice. Mentor-mentee relationships have been around for as long as the ancients:
1. Parenting
Mentoring is parenting. A mentor is a kind of surrogate parent or guardian. To a mentee a mentor may fill in parenting gaps left by the mentee's father or mother. As a child should honor father and mother, a mentee should value the mentor. And as a parent must "bring up" a child, a mentor should motivate and add value to the mentee to rise to higher heights.
2. Coaching
Mentoring is life coaching. The mentor is a life coach to the mentee. The mentor provides moral guidance that should enhance the life of the mentee. The mentor also provides practical coaching (handles and how-tos) on important aspects of success in a specific area of life.
3. Tour Guide
Since the mentor is a tour guide, the mentee is a tourist who explores life's interesting angles and attractions.
As a tour guide the mentor shows the mentee (tourist) the way by leading or advising him/her on what's important, where to look, what to avoid, etc. The most important angle of the tour-guide analogy is that both mentor and mentee should find pleasure in their relationship. Since a tourist is one who travels for pleasure, the mentor and mentee should make theirs an enjoyable journey, a pleasurable experience that they look forward to. Mentoring must remain an exciting expedition, never a bore or dreaded chore.
4. GPS
The mentor acts as a GPS to the mentee. My Garmin GPS unit pinpoints my targeted destination (as I enter the required information), charts the best route, and gives me direction at crucial points along the way.
For our purposes, GPS does not stand for Global Positioning System but Goals Priority Strategy. The mentor must impress upon the mentee how crucial it is to set goals and priorities in life, then help the mentee map out a strategy to achieve those prioritized goals.
Both mentor and mentee should work together to identify what the destination is that the mentee needs to arrive at. Once the end point is set, the mentor then helps direct the mentee to that intended destination.
Of course there will be moments when the mentee may miss the way - even a seasoned driver gets lost at times. But the mentor should quickly "recalculate" to get the mentee back on track before he/she goes too long in the wrong direction. (Don't you love to hear "recalculating" from Garmin or Tom Tom?)
It goes without saying that a GPS cannot furnish the driver with a vehicle, nor can the GPS prepare for the trip or do the driving. The mentee must have something to work with - like the desire to go somewhere in life, the willingness to do what is necessary to get there. Without those essentials the most expensive GPS unit, or, for that matter, the most experienced mentor is totally useless.
A mentee who is not willing to sacrifice for his/her own success should be dumped immediately by a discerning mentor. Mentoring must never become an enabling relationship where a lazy mentee expects the mentor to do for him what he should be doing for himself. Whenever the mentee leaves it to the mentor to pull most of the weight, it's time for the mentor to desert the wagon and find a more ready vessel that is eager to go somewhere.
Perhaps you can think of other great analogies for mentoring. Feel free to share them in the comments box. ~mogama~
Mentoring is neither a radical concept or a modern practice. Mentor-mentee relationships have been around for as long as the ancients:
- Moses (prophet/mentor) and Joshua (military leader/mentee)
- Elijah (blunt prophet/mentor) and Elisha (compassionate prophet/mentee)
- Naomi (widow/mother-in-law/mentor) and Ruth (widow/daughter-in-law/mentee)
- Mordecai (uncle/mentor) and Esther (niece/mentee)
- Socrates (philosopher/mentee) and Plato and Aristotle (students/mentees)
- Barnabas (mature believer/mentor) and Paul (new convert/mentee)
- Paul (seasoned missionary/mentor) and Timothy (young pastor/mentee).
- Mentor and Mentee do not have to be in the same field or occupation.
- Mentor and Mentee should be different by status, position or experience; this sets the perimeters for authority (by Mentor) and respect (from Mentee).
- Mentor and Mentee can be of different gender; a male can mentor a female, and vice versa.
- One mentor can have two or more mentees at the same time.
- Mentor and Mentee do not necessarily have to be of the same temperament.
Mentoring is parenting. A mentor is a kind of surrogate parent or guardian. To a mentee a mentor may fill in parenting gaps left by the mentee's father or mother. As a child should honor father and mother, a mentee should value the mentor. And as a parent must "bring up" a child, a mentor should motivate and add value to the mentee to rise to higher heights.
As a tour guide the mentor shows the mentee (tourist) the way by leading or advising him/her on what's important, where to look, what to avoid, etc. The most important angle of the tour-guide analogy is that both mentor and mentee should find pleasure in their relationship. Since a tourist is one who travels for pleasure, the mentor and mentee should make theirs an enjoyable journey, a pleasurable experience that they look forward to. Mentoring must remain an exciting expedition, never a bore or dreaded chore.
The mentor acts as a GPS to the mentee. My Garmin GPS unit pinpoints my targeted destination (as I enter the required information), charts the best route, and gives me direction at crucial points along the way.
For our purposes, GPS does not stand for Global Positioning System but Goals Priority Strategy. The mentor must impress upon the mentee how crucial it is to set goals and priorities in life, then help the mentee map out a strategy to achieve those prioritized goals.
Both mentor and mentee should work together to identify what the destination is that the mentee needs to arrive at. Once the end point is set, the mentor then helps direct the mentee to that intended destination.
Of course there will be moments when the mentee may miss the way - even a seasoned driver gets lost at times. But the mentor should quickly "recalculate" to get the mentee back on track before he/she goes too long in the wrong direction. (Don't you love to hear "recalculating" from Garmin or Tom Tom?)
It goes without saying that a GPS cannot furnish the driver with a vehicle, nor can the GPS prepare for the trip or do the driving. The mentee must have something to work with - like the desire to go somewhere in life, the willingness to do what is necessary to get there. Without those essentials the most expensive GPS unit, or, for that matter, the most experienced mentor is totally useless.
A mentee who is not willing to sacrifice for his/her own success should be dumped immediately by a discerning mentor. Mentoring must never become an enabling relationship where a lazy mentee expects the mentor to do for him what he should be doing for himself. Whenever the mentee leaves it to the mentor to pull most of the weight, it's time for the mentor to desert the wagon and find a more ready vessel that is eager to go somewhere.
Perhaps you can think of other great analogies for mentoring. Feel free to share them in the comments box. ~mogama~
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